is it really worth it?

I don’t know about you, but I don’t have the perfect marriage. Yes, there are days when I may think I do, but sure enough a moment comes along and I realize quite quickly that it is far from perfect. I have moments where I am down right imperfect. I have moments when I get angry, frustrated, selfish, mean, and nasty, (although I’m sure none of you know what that feels like). What can I say, I’m still a work in progress!!!


It seems to me when Scott & I fight that it’s always about the stupid little things in life.  It's the insignificant petty things that always turn into an argument, never the big important things.  And the other night, we had one of those times. I don’t know if it was just that I was extremely tired from working all day and then volunteering at church all night, but I must have just had a short fuse and he must have had short fuse from the day he had at work.  Anyways, it started off as an easy conversation about his day at work, and quickly became one of the most stupid fights that I can ever remember having. I was tired and trying to get him to tell me quickly a “long” story about a situation at work (long according to Scott, but I think anything beyond 5 words is a “long” story to him ). I kept giving my opinion on this work situation and he kept telling me to calm down and quit having such an attitude, which I wasn’t even worked up, but nothing irritates me more & gets me more worked up than when someone else tries to tell you how you feel about something. 

Well, I bet you can piece together how the rest of the conversation went. I didn’t quite hear the whole “long” story, because the conversation ended up with me storming off to bed, and him stewing irritated at me for the rest of the night.  Honestly, there is nothing I hate more than going to bed angry. I think God was “in the know” when He said that whole thing about not letting the sun go down on your wrath. Man, He’s smart! :) I just hate the feeling of not having a kiss goodnight, or saying I love you to each other. I always have in my mind that life is so precious, and each and every moment is a gift. I hate wasting even one of life’s moments being angry! Unfortunately, this tension boiled over into last night, and we had yet another bad night of being angry at each other.  Nothing is worse than when a stupid fight not only ruins one night, but two nights in a row.

Finally, this morning, I had to stop and think about the past two days and for me, it all boils down to one thought….is this really worth being angry about?  It's the same question that I face in every situation like this and  I’ll give you a hint at the answer.....it's no.  Every single time I ask myself that question, I come to the same conclusion that it’s just not worth it.
 
Regardless of the situation, I can never seem to find a valid reason to stay upset & angry about something. Trust me there are plenty of times that I have tried! I try to argue my case over and over again in my head, trying to convince myself that I am right for wanting to be angry, but always God finds a way to get to me and show me how silly I am acting.  Even in the times when I may be "right" in my reasoning, it's never okay to justify holding a grudge with someone. There are so many times throughout my life that I have truly done stupid things. Things that I was 100% wrong in doing, and things that were worth being upset over, but God reminds me that He gave me His grace and forgiveness that I needed (& didn’t deserve) in each and every one of those situations. He was able to extend His love to me, when I truly was not worthy of it, and I will always need to do the same for others.
 
This is something that sounds easy, but isn’t always easy to live. I try to be a Godly loving wife, but I am still human and still need God’s grace to help me attain some of those attributes in my life, especially in this area. However, one thing that I am completely convinced on is that it is God’s plan is for me to love my husband with His amazing love, and if God has called me to do it then He surely has equipped me with everything I need to accomplish it!!  Let me tell you, it’s not always easy to love Scott with the love of God, especially when we have moments like we had this week, but at the end of the day it boils down to choosing love over choosing anything else. 
 
Scott & I are two imperfect people who made a covenant with each other to be husband and wife and that promise we made to each other will always find a way to bring us through the trails that we face as we walk through life together.  Despite it all, even on our worst of days, I still would rather have him by my side than anyone else.  :)

is it okay to be just me???

I’m gonna have an honesty moment here.  Ok, maybe not an honesty moment since this will be a whole post, but I’m pretty sure you catch my drift.  Sometimes I’m afraid of my blog.  Yes, I said it, I’m afraid of my blog.  Why you ask? Because sometimes, I just don’t know what to say.  Correction: I know what to say but I don’t know how it will be received.  Any of this making sense? Yah I didn’t think so.  Let me back track a bit.

I first started blogging back on Xanga  (anyone remember back that far?) my senior year of high school.  It was the Facebook of that day, and I would blog about all the high school things that were going on in my life at that time.  I have always thoroughly enjoying writing, I journaled religiously throughout high school and blogging quickly became something I enjoyed.  I continued blogging on Xanga sporadically throughout my college years, and it was hard to keep up on once Myspace and Facebook came along.  I actually just went back and dusted off my Xanga account the other day, and I am honestly thankful that I used it as much as I did during those late teenage years of my life.  I really enjoyed gong back through all my posts and reading my thoughts at those times in my life.  I don't always remember the details, and even if I do, its good to read through how I felt at those times.  Life changes so fast, that it can be hard to really capture all those details, and blogging has been a great tool for me to re-live all those moments.

Fast forward to 2008 when I started blogging here on Blogger.  I was a newlywed and missed blogging all my thoughts and experiences in life.  I figured what better time to get back into then right as we were starting our new life together.  I had hoped to be able to share a lot of what our new life as husband and wife, the good things that happened, the bad things we faced, the amazing God things that we experienced, and all the days in between.  I started off pretty good as I browse through my earlier posts, but slowly began neglecting by blog.  About a year ago I started finding all these amazing home decorating, DIY blogs and my blogging purpose had been renewed!! I was so inspired and wanted to try my hand at some of the great projects that I had seen all over the place.  Since that time, so many wonderful people have stopped by my blog, commented on my projects, and some have even been kind enough to follow along with me.  I find that SO cool that you would think that my blog is worthy of your time.  I have loved being inspired by others ideas, and getting to know so many wonderful people through blogging.  I hope that some of you following feel the same way about me.

All this has brought me to today…. sometimes I struggle with the thought of how to combine my initial hopes for blogging and my renewed thrifty DIY purpose of blogging into this one blog.  I sometimes feel like if I do blog about my marriage or my day to day life, that I am somehow letting down those of you how found my blogs through the projects I have shared, and expect me to share more of those ideas, but if all I ever do is just blog projects, I feel like I am letting myself down for not really capturing all the memories I had hoped to.  See where it gets hard?  I really want to find that balance of both, but still make it enjoyable for others to read along with me on my daily life journeys.  

I guess I said all this to say,  that you will probably see more posts about my life in the upcoming days. I hope you won't find me too boring, or choose to not follow along anymore.  I usually don't get many comments on my personal posts, and that's ok because it's truly a post for me if nothing else.  I hope that there will be things that you find relate-able, after all we all face the same types of challenges, and joys in life.  I guess i just really I don't want everything I post to fall into just one category, I truly want this blog to change as I change, and follow me through all the things that life brings my way.  Someday I know that I will blogging about my kids, and my life as a parent...I hope you'll stick around with me for that!!  I definitely will continue to post my revamps and creative attempts, its very much a part of who I am!! 

Thanks for reading and following along in life with me,  it means more to me than you could ever know!  Most of all, I hope that its ok with you that I want to be just me.  After all, I think I'm a pretty cool person. :)

Twenty-Four

Yesterday was my husband's 24th birthday!! I can't believe he's 24!! Seems like just yesterday we were teenagers, man time sure does fly!!! I am so grateful that I have been able to be a part of his life for as long as I have been, and I'm beyond thankful to God for making him to be the greatest person I have had the privileged to know.  So, happy happy birthday honey (even though I told you this yesterday)!!

Here's a little mix of what we did on his birthday!!! Hope you enjoy it! :)

wordless wednesday

<3 <3 <3

TEAM BRINLEY!!!!!!!!!!

My adorable nephew Brinley is in a contest for cutest baby, and I really really really need your help!!  He's currently in 2nd place and need some more votes!!  This in where you come in, if you are on Facebook, can you take literally 2 minutes of your time to vote for him??

It's VERY easy, just follow the links below and "LIKE" JM Photography, and then go to his picture (he's #7) and comment VOTE!! 

It would truly mean the world to me if you would be kind enough to do this for me.  If he wins, he gets a FREE photography session and some credit towards prints! He just turned ONE yesterday and this would be a great birthday present for him.

Here's the links!!

First, like JM Photography, then comment VOTE on this picture!!!

I mean, really how can you say no to that face???? Thanks guys!!!

mirror mirror on the wall

So, I finally ventured to the new thrift store right by my house.  I can't believe its been there for a few months and this was just my first visit!! I had a few things in mind when I went looking, but I couldn't believe I actually found one of them, it usually doesn't work out that way on my first try!!

I browsed through the store and nearly missed this beauty because it was hiding behind another bulky piece of furniture.  I about freaked out when I found it, it was only marked $12!! I love the gorgeous detail of it and I knew I could make it something fabulous!  The best part was that everything in the store was 30% off so it actually only cost me $9! Can we say steal of a deal?! 

I brought this baby home, and got right to work.  It had these weird metal rods attached to it, I'm assuming that it was a part of a set or something???

I unscrewed the legs, and then sanded this puppy down.  I decided that I wanted to paint it white (shocking right??) but I choose a glossy white this time so it would match the other pieces in my living room.  I really wanted to get it covered, so I did about 4 coats total.  

Here's the final result!!!

Love, love, love!!! Honestly I can't believe this was only $9!!

Here's some close up of the gorgeous detail that I fell in love with.

Oh so perfect!! It's not hung up yet because I don't have all the hardware that I need to hang it up since it's so heavy, but I will definitely get it done this week.  I was just too excited to not share it with you guys!

Ok, one last little peak at it!

It's gonna be SO perfect in my entryway, I can't even stand it!! :)  Tell me your thoughts, do you love it too???