recently i have been feeling really tested. there has been a lot of pressure and a lot of tension that has been brought my way. i feel like when you are being tested things compound on top of each other and it becomes this huge mountain that you feel crushed under. i know that what i am facing is nothing new, it's not something that others have not faced in their lives, but when you are in the middle of it you can get to feeling so alone, like there is no where to turn, nothing that could make it better.
i won't get into details about what exactly i have been facing, but it feels as if over the last month it has been blow after blow after blow, and it finally came to the boiling point yesterday. as i found myself with tears in my eyes talking to scott i knew i had two choices. i could either wallow in the adversity, or i could acknowledge it and lay it at my Father's feet. i knew what the enemy wanted me to do, it was as if i could hear him whisper in my ear "there is nothing you can do, things will only get worse, keep crying because it cannot be overcome." thankfully my spirit knew better, it reminded me that the enemy is a liar and that the word of God is faithful and true. scott and i spent some time together in prayer and just laid all our cares at the Father's feet. it was, and is a struggle to not take up those cares, to not acknowledge those thoughts but i am CHOOSING to walk in faith. i am choosing to believe the word of God. i am looking past the adversity and straight to the answer. i cannot be defeated and i will not quit.
this morning on my way to work i was spending time with the Father and He reminded me of what the truth of the word is. this is what i was reminded of:
[james 1:2-4]
Consider it a sheer gift, friends, when tests and challenges come at you from all sides. You know that under pressure, your faith-life is forced into the open and shows its true colors. So don't try to get out of anything prematurely. Let it do its work so you become mature and well-developed, not deficient in any way.
so i am choosing to count this all joy, because my faith will be strengthed and in the end i will be entire and complete, well-development in EVERY way. praise God for His word and that in the trials and tests of this life that we have a hope to cling to! what a good God i serve!
Pinkmas Christmas
2 days ago